“Don’t find fault. Find a remedy.” Henry Ford
It’s amazing how all of us make something out of nothing.
In fact, I believe one of the reasons the Seinfeld show has lived on in residual rerun heaven is because it is true to life on so many levels.
As Jerry Seinfeld has stated many times, the program was all about nothing. On its surface, that’s a correct statement.
And, I’m not here questioning his mission or motives. After all, he wrote the show and made a fortune so he would know better than anyone else. It was his vision.
Now before I go on any further, please know this piece is not some quasi-erudite attempt at analysis of the show and explain its true meaning. The show is what it is and that’s it.
But, there is a point to all of this.
Seinfeld was always about the “superficial something else” rather than substantive and significant concerns. And, the show worked because it mirrored real life. It was and still is a funny show.
And, the truth is it’s so much easier dealing with the extraneous and tangential, making them an integral component of life rather than engaging in the actual. That takes time and could be painful.
Recently, my wife and I ran to a woman we have known for quite a while but hadn’t seen in years.
At first, I could not recall knowing her. However, the more she talked (and she talked and talked), the more I was able to decode the reason for the memory lapse.
Call it selective brain stunting, memory repression, suppressive awareness, call it whatever you like. But somehow, I just didn’t want to remember her.
There’s the old saying about “what the mind can conceive, the mind can achieve.” Well, my medulla oblongata had done an outstanding job of erasing almost all mental traces of this woman.
She was a nice person. It wasn’t the fact that she was so long-winded. I could deal with that. It was the steadfast evidence that she was a “cause” person and everything important in her life seemed based on some impending crisis. For years, that’s been her modus operandi.
That was her whole tone of conversation.
She would tell us about her latest findings, gruesome discoveries and harrowing tales of impending disaster but we never got to know her and find out what made her tick.
After a while and by design, we would see less and less of her. We wanted more than hearing about the latest conspiracy or catastrophe in the making.
A steady diet of gloom and doom doesn’t fit my regimen. There’s enough problems in the world and I do my best to either avoid trouble or find a workable solution and move on.
I give props to her and to anyone else that dedicates time, money and effort to make the world a better place.
We need more of that from all of us.
I am not a psychologist but believe this person’s constant and ever-changing involvement in Causes and Crisis had more to do with personal Deflection than curing and solving universal failings and discomfort.
Let me explain. We all need a reason for being and life today can be very challenging. “Sticking with it” and “giving it your best shot” are not only admirable qualities, they are indispensable criteria for survival. That is a given.
What I’m referring to is living a life replete with crisis and causes absent the pursuit of solution.
We all get “hung-up” on things in life. At times that allegiance can transform into something fixed and unwavering….until…..
…..Until, like fashion, the arbiters of agitation decree that it is now imperative to fix complete attention on the newest crisis model.
Again, this piece is not meant to discredit the worthy efforts of those who offer their support and/or devote their lives to making the world a better place for those in need. We need more people who really care and do good works.
What I’m saying is it’s all too easy to get lost in trend than to actually take time to unearth and accept the actual you.
Years ago, my main topic was “The Surrender Solution.” It was not about giving up. It was about surrendering. And, surrender is the acceptance of a new beginning.
What is obvious to others is unseen by ourselves, thus we discount the conspicuous because it appears hidden and concealed in plain sight.
That new beginning can be scary. It’s a revelation that involves forgiveness. Forgiving others who brought pain, sorrow and discomfort to our lives.
More importantly, it means forgiveness and acceptance of who we are, what we have or should have done We can spend so much time in life beating up on ourselves for the smallest and most insignificant matters that happened in the past. And, where does it get us?
Here’s the kicker: Most of the time, we are the only ones carrying the burden because the issue is long forgotten and now meaningless. It should be dead. It has no value, but we keep it going on our own revival circuit..
But when is enough, enough? Isn’t it time to hold the crucifixion, someone forgot the nails?
Hey, we are dealing with non-substance. But when did sense enter into the equation. We are human. We are fallible.
Because we are not perfect, we will continue to make mistakes. Sure, we can look back in retrospect on some really stupid things done in life.
Talk about cringe factor. I could spend years in a corner berating myself for all the senseless and hurtful things I’ve done. But, where does it get me? In reality, all that is right now is a “was.”
It’s the past. The date of expiration on the guilt-trip package came and went all so long ago. It is not deserving of respect, attention or restoration. It can only bring on illness and worry or worse.
I can’t change what has happened and can only learn from the experience and hopefully then move on to being a better person by forgiving myself.
Look upon it this way: Your self-appointed sentence has been commuted for time already served.
So stop trying to be what you are not. You are no god and never will be. We are human.
We are surrounded by artificial intelligence, holograms, CGI and avatars but, nothing takes the place of the real thing. And, the real thing is the real you.
We are the Source of what we do in life. Now, I’m not overlooking Divine participation, but it’s up to us to choose our path and destiny.
We are over the age of 50. Isn’t it time to get in touch with who we really are? if for no other reason than it assists in revealing and implementing solutions for so many causes and crises. It’s coming from the heart.
If there is another way, please let me know. This is not a time for doubt and uncertainty.
Singer/Songwriter Jimmy Buffet has a very funny take on vacillation when he said. “Indecision may or may not be the problem.” Love it.
When you get down to it, life is not a Seinfeld episode. It’s not all about nothing. It is about something else. That something else is getting to know yourself.
No longer are you a stranger to yourself.
Whatever it is in what you believe, whatever issues, crises and causes demand your passion and attention, they are fueled and given force by the complete you. There is no doubt because the truth comes from your core.
Being in touch with the real you activates an inner compass that neither accepts nor tolerates deflection or self-deceit.
Being one with yourself activates the self-forgiving heart.